1 /5 Elizabeth Dilley: ** Skip to bottom if youre not interested in context and just want to read my experience from here.
I would like to preface this review with some details about my health history, issues that may not be as important to others.
- anxiety
- severe depression
- autism spectrum
- two autoimmune disorders
- germaphobia
As a kid I had multiple very traumatic experiences at the dentist, my dentist (Dr. Wayne Grossman of Sacramento, CA) was physically abusive to his patients and had many abuse claims against him before his death. His practice did not allow parents into the back, no exceptions. During procedures, he would sit on me or put his knee on me and restrain me to the chair with leather cuffs and do extractions with no numbing or gas. These experiences, coupled with financial difficulty made it hard to go to the dentist on a regular basis.
We struggled financially as my husband and I struggled working and paying for college as young adults with no financial assistance. To the point where for many years I was on CALFresh (food assistance) and MediCAL (free medical insurance). For anyone who *understands* poverty you may know that "free" dental care only covers your front teeth. So, when a tooth needed a filling or in my case a root canal and crown it cost me $3,600. Regular maintenance was not a fiscal option, fear and shame aside.
I was laid off from two tech jobs in a massive wave of layoffs. So, apologies to the dental industry but I just missed those short windows to see a dentist (too busy trying to make sure I could pay my rent and eat that month).
I have tried to be more consistent with my dental appointments in the past two years with a steady job but have unfortunately, had to deal with more pressing medical issues. I have had three major surgeries with long recovery times and go to a physical therapy office once a week.
I am a germaphobe who wore masks in public pre-pandemic, struggle with change, and have severe anxiety then it becomes VERY hard to maintain. I luckily found a dentist and hygienist that I *love* however, two back to back scheduling errors and staff leaving left me not able to properly prepare myself for the appointments.
I decided to try a new dentist closer to my house with *rave* reviews. When I called to schedule I was extremely up front and honest about why I was trying a new office (wanted consistent care from the same providers) and that proper mask wearing is very important to me. The receptionist was kind, considerate, and extremely accommodating. When I arrived at the office everyone who spoke to me had on a mask and was so nice!!
HOWEVER, the dentist was unkind, condescending, and treated me like a child. He shamed me *multiple* times for not flossing enough (even though I literally started the conversation stating I knew my teeth were not great and I was ashamed and embarrassed!!) and for not using a water flosser. During his very painful examination of scraping each tooth, blowing cold air on them, and pushing down my gums I began to cry. I cried because he had horrible bedside manner and was making me feel like I was a disgusting slob with bad hygiene and I cried because his exam physically hurt. While sobbing, he brought me tissues and pretty much told me to get it together and that it shouldnt hurt (yay for gaslighting a womans pain level in 2024, real cool move). I mentioned to him twice that I had never had an exam like this before. He finished his exam and then pretty much continued to shame me as he gave me my treatment plan. Oh, and then asked why I was nervous about getting fillings-- I said well, I am very afraid of needles and he said (glances at my chart), oh come on youve done this a bunch of times and youll be fine.
The staff deserve five stars and I am only sorry that they have to be attached to a lower star review. But, I just think anyone with anxiety should know that this dentist has truly abhorrent bedside manner. So, if youre interested in being shamed then this is a great place for you. Otherwise, steer clear.
